The Down Low Badge of Honor

  Many of you know what the term "Down Low" means.  Some of us remember when R. Kelly sang about "keep it on the down low," in regards to sleeping with Mr. Biggs' (Ron Isley's Lady).  However, in later years author J. L. King, wrote about men "On the Down Low," later creating a phenomena that has become a negative connotation in society today.
   A man that is described as being on the down low is portrayed as being a man who is Gay or Bisexual and denies his sexuality. This man could be married or sleeps with women to cover up the fact that he enjoys sex with men. The man on the Down Low could also have many women, but also have many men on the side. Some of his hang ups could be the stupid "no fats, no fems" policy as well as "I don't bottom."
  As I reminisce over my days of being on BGC, A4A, and things of that nature I always ran across those adds with "top only," "no queens," and "no bitch shit."  Most guys will have the letters "DL" in their screen-name and bio and will stress that they are on the DL. Don't get me wrong, I'm not mad because they choose to be DL. Hell, I was DL at one time, however I felt better when I came out of the closet of hell and shame and began to love me for who I am. Whatever the reason due to status or profession and religious values some guys are DL.  However, you have some who treat it as a badge of honor.
  What does it mean to have "The Down Low Badge of Honor?"  Well When one carries the DL Badge of Honor, one only hangs around straight acting men and constantly down openly gay men or men who they know to be gay period.  Some guys are proud to live in the negative connotation of being on the down low.  Some even go as far to say that guys who admit they are gay are diseased and more prone to HIV and other STD's. However, anyone is vulnerable to HIV/AIDS today. Educate yourself.
  When wearing the "DL Badge of Honor," one refuses to be caught dead red at a gay club or anything that looks remotely gay, however behind closed doors that DL guy is somebody's bottom and not always on the top.  He may even like feminine dudes to a certain degree.  But more than likely they only deal with guys who are masculine and don't "look or act gay." 
  I really don't understand why hiding who you really are is a symbol of honor with some people, but why lie about what you like.  It may be because of family and job, but always be true to yourself. It may be a difficult road, but you can make it.  My advice to those who treat being Down Low and deceptive by using women and making babies to cover up themselves is this; IT'S 2013, YOU'RE GAY GET OVER IT!!!!



  1. First, an outstanding manifesto, Lil Buddy. So true. I was in a relationship with a DL man for about nine months. He was nice, attentive and so full of love. But he was DL and that rapidly became the issue. That, and every time we had sex his legs were over his head with his ass pointed directly in my direction! His version of "top" was his booty poised high! As for the STI factor, he never wanted me to wear a condom. Two years after we ended our relationship, he was back crawling and begging for another chance. So much for "no bitch drama."


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