You Can't Be Nobody's Lover

  There's a song that Ashford and Simpson did in the Good Old Days of Real Music called "Over & Over."  The song says "Over and Over, Time Again, You can't be nobody's lover, till you're somebody's friend."
  This song has been resonating in my spirit for the last few days. It's something about those original school songs. They had a message. "Over and Over," also covered by the Late Sylvester, has a message of "Being Friends First."
  This song is still relevant to today's society in a time to where things are rushed ie marriage, relationships, life, and death.

As the lyrics teach us, yes you can fall in love with someone and have that strong connection, but take some time to know that person and for that person to get to know you. Don't start planning a wedding on the first date.  I've made that mistake myself a few times.
  So many times we, especially those of us in the LGBT Community and those of us 30 and up are in a rush to settle down to where we settle for any and everything.  Well I hate to tell you, learn how to be someone's friend!!!
  I know it sucks to be friend zoned, but I must admit friends make the best lovers and partners.  Why is that? Well a friend takes the time to get to know a person's likes, dislikes, what makes them tick, their history, their life story, and the things that have caused a  person pain in the past or things that a person tend to avoid.
  Nick Ashford encourages to not only look at the cover, but to look deeper.  Father Ashford was right. So many times we look at the physical aspect, how they dress, and what we see the first go round.  Being friends first allows you to see even the deep, dark, ugly secrets that lie within.  "How does a book look before it's even read?"
  Taking your time to know a potential mate or life partner is crucial.  It will allow you to see that person's true colors and determine if that's a person that you really want to spend the rest of your life with.  What if that person ends up having an illness that you don't think you can handle? What if that person turns out to be abusive or manipulative? What if you find out that the person that you are dating is not really who you thought they were because you forgot about the "friends" equation?
  What if you find out that the potential mate is a person that is necessary for your life?  One must take these things into consideration before being a person's lover.
Remember You Can't be Nobody's Lover Until You're Somebody's Friend


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