Can You Really Be Friends With Your Ex?

Photo by mwangi gatheca on Unsplash

Can you really be friends with your ex? It work for some and it doesn't work for others. It may work depending on how the relationship ended. It may also depend on what may have transpired in the relationship.

Right now I'm seeking answers to that question.  Can I really be friends with my ex?  Given my dating history and the bullcrap that I've had to put up with, I can truly say that I can't be friends with my exes.

This blog post comes from an experience that I had a couple days ago with an ex.  Many of you are familiar with my ex "Hamp."  Well Hamp and I had reconnected last year and we tried dating a 3rd time, but that quickly crashed and burned. We did however decide to remain friends.  Things were good until a couple months of ago in our friend  situationship.  We ended up becoming friends with benefits.
  Well in May Hamp got scarce and just seemed distant. We had just had a conversation about "going ghost on each other."  I didn't understand the problem, but know I know why he became distant. For two weeks Hamp had stop responding to my texts, IMs and all of my calls were going to voicemail.

When he finally responded it was very short and quick. He stated that he was taking time for himself and focusing on him.  I had already made it clear that I didn't want to get into relationship with him again.  It was eerily obvious that there was still feelings on both of our parts.
Fast forward today,  I saw on Facebook that he has a new lover.  I was taken aback, but I put two and two together.  He basically trashed our friendship or whatever with no communication because he was dating someone and couldn't tell me.  That was a classic FUCK BOY move.

Yes, my feelings were hurt and I was peeved, but I also realized we aren't dating. It hurt because he said that he would always be my friend and he would never mistreat me or just throw me away like I'm last Christmas's toy.  Well he lied and did exactly what he said he wouldn't do.

I then quickly realized that I CANNOT be friends with my ex.  It just won't work. I made the mistake of thinking we could just be friends with benefits. I should've known that this was gonna happen. It's a repeat cycle with him.  

As of now Hamp is no longer in my phone, on my social media and I have no contact with him. At this point I know that is best for me to move on and count it as a lesson.



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