Let me begin this post about defining Heteronormativity. Heteronormativity is the belief that people fall into distinct and complementary genders (man and woman) with natural roles in life. It asserts that heterosexuality is the only sexual orientation or only norm, and states that sexual and marital relations are most (or only) fitting between people of opposite sexes.
Since I have began my transition from male to female, Heteronormativity has been constantly thrown in my face. I can't help because I am Gay and I refuse to help or get counseling because I am a proud Black Transgender Woman!!! I am a woman with purpose!!!
Heteronormativity showed up while I was getting my hair styled by my best friend. My uncle opens his transphobic mouth with "why are you getting those braids so long."
My response was "because I want to," and I continue to gab with my best friend. It really pissed me off. For the last year and a half my family aka my dad's side has known that I'm gay and that I am transgender. I guess being in a Fundamentalist Christian Black Family you get hell for not being hypermasculine, straight, and nongender conforming.
The shade with my uncle is that I honest look at how he will be watching a show and there will be something dealing with the LGBT community he'll linger for half and episode and then turn. Then there are times I constantly here comments of disgust that makes me wonder if he isn't a self hating Gay Black man in Denial Himself.
Is is possible that religion and society is responsible for this heteronormativity? YES IT IS!!!
In Christianity and most religions we are taught there are Male and Female and no other genders. However if you look at ethnic groups such as Native Americans, African Culture before White Evangelicals appeared on the scene, There were 3rd and 4th genders and those who were homosexual, bisexual or pansexual where well respected and treated as royality. Do your research people.
Not to mention that many great conquerors such as Alexander the Great had male lovers, but due to society they were forced to marry at a certain age. My My how times have changed.
Now we have people like Kim Burrell bashing the same people that do their hair, change their oil, teach their children. When will the madness end?
It is shameful that it is 2017 and people can't even open up their mind past religion. We have so many people killing themselve because they are in families that push heteronormativity down their LGBT family members throats.
Not to mention that many LGBT Black People tend to mimic heterosexual relationships. My favorite phrase is "no fems," or if you are a top you must be masculine or a bottom you must be fem. How about we just let people be without the labels and learn how to love and accept them as a whole?
See the picture above? That picture depicts a happy transwoman. I haven't always been this happy.
Why? Mainly because I felt that I was trapped in the wrong body. Trapped in an evil costume that caused me to act and be something that I knew I wasn't. This is called "Gender Dysphoria."
As I progress in my transition, I am proud to say that I am now enrolled into therapy to go further in my transition, mentally process things, and deal with the emotional trials that may come my way. I must say that therapy is much needed.
During my time away, I've become comfortable with myself and I took the time to clear other people's opinions on what Trans is supposed to look like. Trans comes in many shapes, sizes, styles, and shades.
Us trans people are often overlooked when we don't look like Laverne Cox or Even Caitlyn Jenner. But this is MY transition, MY Journey, and no one else's. I am proud of where I am going. With the new and improved Musique's Poetry, I will be covering this journey!!!
Many of you have been wondering where I have been the last week or so. Well I've actually been taking me some me time that was much needed.
Since the release of the crazy, bitter ex, I've had to spend sometime regrouping. Through this time I was able to focus on me and regain my focus on my music and the move to the DMV.
I had spent so much time trying to make something work, but the only thing that was working was my money.
Sometimes people don't want you because they love you. They see what you have to offer and what you can do for them and they neglect the love factor and focus on the "what can I get out of this person factor."
It is sad and unfortunate, but I'm thankful for the experience. Why? Well It is allowing me to transition like I desire. It is also allowing me to explore the polyamorous side of me. I'm in a time of exploration and a time of transition. If you want to be apart of this transition please click on the link below. This is how you call can stand with me in solidarity.
The United in Christ Cathedral Will be having their Fall Fashion Show On Oct. 17th, 2015 at 7pm. We are now recruiting Models. The cut off date for signing up to model is September 26, 2015. The Categories are: Formal Wear, Back to School, Sunday's Best, Business Casual, and for my Pre-Teens (12 and Under), Dream Job (What I Want to Be When I Grow Up). The Registration Fee for Models 13 and up is $10.00. 12 and Under $5.00. For More Information Please Contact Pastor Bradley Suberat 980 224 2485 or by Email Bsuberministries@gmail.com. The address will be 2625 Cherry Road Rock Hill, SC (Quality Inn and Suites) . Rehearsals will be announced and given to all participants. There will also be entertainment and encouraging words,
Ain't this some ish? The Feds have shut down famed sex site, Rentboy.com. No Lie they actually did. On August 25th, the federal government arrested CEO Jeffrey Hurant and 6 employees, as well as took boxes and servers in a raid that was part of a sting operation.
They have been charged with male prostitution....Wait what about all the heterosexual sites that promote heterosexual prostitution and female prostitution? Can homeland security find a better way to spend our money, like finding actual terrorists and not arresting people trying to make a living the best they know how.
Let's talk about the people that sell sex to make it through college or to keep from being homeless. I think it is time for the decriminalization of sex workers. That has been the oldest profession in the books. What is so cheesy is that they chose to take down an lgbt site. Really.
With the recent murders of 18 Transpeople, 16 of those being People of Color, Women of Color, I have been considering my own mortality. Why? Well for starters, I'm a Black Genderqueer living in South Carolina. This is the place where the Charleston 9 were murdered in a worship facility, the Confederate Flag was Finally Taken down from the state house after 150 years, and unfortunately, South Carolina is still ass backwards in time and thinking.
I recall one day as I began to take a walk in my neighborhood, in early spring 2015, I was dressed and painted for the Gods and I heard a White Man yell "You're a Boy." I kept walking and ignored him and acted unbothered, when the truth was, I was fearful that he and his Hillbilly boys were going to attack me and beat me just for wearing a scarf, skinny jeans, light blue shoes, and dangling earrings.
Thankfully I walked away with my life, but I am saddened that my sisters that have been attacked recently were not afforded a chance to live and tell a survivors story. So as we speak I am writing to advocate for #Translivesmatter.
We hear Black Lives Matter so much more than Trans Lives Matter. Should a person's gender identity, determine if they are worth fighting for? Hell No!!! It is times like this where I feel that the same people yelling Black Lives Matter should be Yelling Trans Lives Matter, especially Black Trans Lives!!!
Even in the LGBT Community The Trans-family is overlooked, demonized and dehumanized with unrealistic standards of beauty, dictation of transition, and being told they are going to die just for being transgender, non-gender conforming, or genderqueer, Especially adding that they are people of color on top of that.
Where is the love especially in the Black LGBT Community for my Trans-family? Is it the fact that the Black Community is already homophobic, but when it comes to gender there is always a phobia to those who don't line up with a strict gender identity.
Yes there is transphobia in the LGBT Community. You have Gays and Lesbians that refuse to call Transpeople by the proper pronoun. They disrespect us by calling us the name we've left behind.
These are the things that I face as a Genderqueer in America.
There are times in our life where we must take leaps of faith and must take a chance on something that will greatly benefit us. Right now I am in this place.
Right now I am contemplating some moves that will greatly benefit me in the area of my music career, and liberating myself from the humdrum of working a 9-5. This is one reason why I am stepping up my game with this blog.
Many people have asked why I haven't been blogging as much, well the truth is that I've needed some time away to evaluate some things about my life and about what I really want out of life. I am doing the best I can to audition with a heavy work schedule as well as keep the creative juices flowing.
I've even started a crowdfunding to help me jump start my music career. I'm trying to make waves for myself. However, I'm staying patient and resilient that God will answer my prayers soon.
We all get to a point to where we get burned out and get tired. Burn out happens when you are over your head in stress and when so many people desire so much of your time. But sometimes we get tired and we have to take some time for ourselves to regroup and refresh.
I'm at that point right now. It happens every blue moon. I do apologize for not being very active on this blog site, but I haven't really felt like blogging nor have I had the time. I do thank you all for viewing this blog site and I thank you for showing your support and keeping up with my Youtube Channel. I may not have a million views nor a million followers, but I am thankful that you all think enough of me to come by and to comment, share, and input your ideas into this blog.
It really means a lot to me. I pray that you all bare with me as I change some things in my routine. I realize that with some things going on in my life, that posting may not happen everyday, but I count it all joy when I am able to post ont his blog.
Posting is a release. I've stop saying I am not a superstar blog, but I am declaring that I am a SUPERSTAR!!!! I look forward to great things happening for this blog.
As I write this post, my mind goes back to a hot August day. It was the beginning of my Friday before the big campus parties and my homegirl "Cree," and I were eating lunch.
Cree asked me "Yannick, what type of work did you do back home."
"I work as a church musician and I used to work at a hardware store," I replied as I munched on my good old cheeseburger.
I looked up and Cree had this puzzled look on her face. It was like her face had became numb and she replied "But You're Gay."
I couldn't do anything but laugh.
It had me thinking to myself "Does my sexuality determine what type of job I should have?"
Many people often have the stereotype that Gay Men, Transgender people, and gender non conforming people often can only snag call center jobs, office jobs, fast food jobs, and stereotypically Hairdressers or make up artists.
This misconception is entirely untrue. Would you believe it if I told you that I've worked in a warehouse, grouphomes, day camp facilities, and I've even been a stage manager? These are some of the occupations that I as a genderqueer have held, femininity and all.
There are many people just like me that have jobs that people do not see them fit for. However, my sexuality does not qualify me, my work ethic and experience does.
Many people do not see me holding high ranking positions in ministry either because I'm gay. The last time I checked God looks at my heart not my sexuality.