With the University of Massachusetts's, sophomore, Derrick Gordon step out of the closet last week admitting and acknowledging that he was Gay. Many said that this move was career suicide and others stated that he would only be seen as a Black Gay Man who happens to be a talented basketball player. However, I beg to differ.
My question to you is, is one's sexuality really that important? We are currently living in a society where in some arenas, especially religious and political, one's sexuality can make your or break you. Sad to say that as society "progresses" we still have some ignorant people.
Now with Derrick coming out, I think this is a brave step and acknowledges that LGBT people are in every aspect of our lives. They are in our churches, our jobs, our movies, music, construction companies. They come in all shapes, sizes, styles, colors, hues, and also they are not all masculine, feminine, or HIV positive...THEY ARE HUMAN!!!
Now back to sexuality and it's importance. Is it so important that a person is Gay, Bi, Straight, or Transgender that we over look their talent and their personality? Is it important that it overshadows their good will towards man and the charity work that they do? Is it that much that we limit them to a satirical character on a TV show?
Let's not get into the satire portrayed on Gay Black Men. Make that Gay men in general. Gay men are thought of as flamboyant queens, but we have some masculine men that happen to be gay and happy, while others are just over the top, and sadly attention seeking, however, they are yet HUMAN.
So Is One's sexuality really that important?
As I write this post, I am anticipating great things in my life and anticipating a great weekend. I will be meeting with a very special artist this weekend at a concert and I of course will be posting about it.
However, I'm writing about those three magic words; I Love You. Those words have been spoken throughout all eternity and carry so much weight. Those three words have been the building and also the ruin of mankind. It has been abused, used, and carelessly thrown around.
When I hear the words "I love you," the hopeless romantic in me jumps up and starts waltzing around the universe, but unless I see action I begin to doubt if that love is real. With me those three words mean something and should not be taking lightly. When I say "I Love You," I'm stating my commitment to you. I'm stating that intend on us being a forever edition.
Unfortunately, love has burned me, turned me cold, but I refuse to be alone and old. I'm like the Tinman in "The Wiz,""What Would I Do if I Could Feel?"What would I do if I could feel "I love you" and not just hear it. I have to know it and not just utter it. What would I do?
So Many of you know that I've recently thrown myself back into the dating game. There have been some suitor's but there is one that I'm sticking with. We'll call him Leland. Leland and I met last year via Facebook. We met in one of the groups that I participate in Facebook. He and I are both into the church, both are unique, we both love musicals, and we have so many opposite qualities that seem to push us together.
Leland is a great guy. I can tell it in the way we talk on the phone, Skype, text, Facebook. However there is one drawback. He's in New York and I'm in South Carolina....Now before you all start judging me and hounding me about Destination DMV. Many people have stated "Musique, Find you someone in DC." Yes, that seems logical, but I'm curious to see how this will work with me and Leland. We've spent so much time getting to know each other and we have an understanding. Even when it seemed like I may have found someone here in good ole's South Carolina, it seems that I'm thinking more of Leland. Many have also advised that I shouldn't venture into a long distance relationship because it wouldn't work. To be honest, I've done it before, but the reason why the relationship did not work was because of me being "too fem." However, the thing I like about Jamal is that he doesn't think of me of being too fem and not even me being HIV Positive scares him. Leland is very well educated on HIV/AIDS and knows what he wants in a mate. Leland and I, as far as I can see are very compatible.
Now granted we are working on our first date due to the distance, my question to you is "can long distance relationships really work." There are so many issues that come into play such as trust, monogamy, honesty, who's being faithful, family life, and low and behold what it is like to live with that person. Now I've known many couples to be in a long distance relationship and they end up getting married and are happy. Others have not be so fortunate. Also I'm worried with my impending move to DC. What is going to happen? I guess I'll have to run on and see what the end is going to be.
Can long distance relationships work?
Well many of you know that 14 days ago I turned 28. Don't I make it look good? I'm so glad that I have made it this far. Again I thank you all for the love that you've shown me and the birthday wishes and gifts!!!!
Many of you know that recently I was diagnosed as HIV positive. My best friend Senor Paco along with my Bestie Varron encouraged me that this was not my end, but my beginning!!!.
I'm excited about life at this point because I'm currently undetectable, healthy and living, loving and being free. Many people think of one being HIV positive of one being sick, and near death. That is not the case. HIV is the virus that, if left untreated, could progress to full blown AIDS. Many people are positive and do not know it because they don't get tested or they just feel that not knowing is better. Knowing is the best policy for yourself and others.
It is important to know your status by getting tested and knowing your partners status and being honest. Also if you are positive get treatment and stay with it.
Don't I make 28 look good?
Jensen Atwood and Darryl Stephens "Noah's Arc: Jumping the Broom" Movie Still From Patrik Ian Polk
Alot of people have been asking me, "Why aren't you dating." I know that I've written about this many times before. I've even listed my reasons for being single. I've recently gotten back into the dating game. Yes I'm finally making time to stop and smell the flowers!!!! However, I am not in a rush to find that special someone.
It is funny though I saw a picture on Tumblr, that read "if you are a single, Gay, Black Man over 30, then you should stop trying." I so disagree with that saying. That sounded it like it came from either a jaded sugar-baby that has been scorned trying to play older men or some jackass who is over 30 and married or in a relationship. Now honey, sugar, sugar boo-boo, I'm 28 and single. I've had my share of relationships, flings, and cut buddies, but I'm at the stage of my life where I am preparing to accomplish some major dreams and it would be nice to have someone to share that with. Even if I don't get that special someone right now, I will be very okay with that. I'm not going to stress myself and I'm not gonna let single life get me down.
Just as long as I have God, Family, and Music, I'm okay, but I do know that I won't be single much longer. Right now, I'm really still finding me which, I've learned is a life long process and I hope that he can handle all that comes with me. I'm hoping that I'll find my "Wade." I'm like the late Phoebe Snow "I just want something real before I die."
It's the weekend and I'm enjoying it so far. I got to see one of my favorite singers last night...the dynamic Queen of the B3 Hammond Organ, TWINKIE CLARK!!!! If you all have kept up with my Facebook, Twitter, and this blog, you know I'm a Clark Sisters groupie.
Now that everything is said and done, I'm going to enjoy the rest of my weekend and have time with my friends and potential mate (that will be discussed at a later time). I'm still celebrating my birthday and helping one of my close friends celebrate his birthday as well.
I want to thank you all for the birthday wishes and the love that you've shown me for my big 28th. It was a great birthday. I spent it with close friends and made some new ones.
I also went to a health seminar concerning Black Gay Men and HIV/AIDS. It was very informative and exciting. Not to mention that I was able to get the heck out of dodge for a couple days. I really needed a weekend away. Well I'm off to enjoy my Sunday.
Comedian, Writer, and Activist, Sampson McCormick makes us laugh, but he will also make you think. Known for his hit comedy "That Bitch Better Be Funny," (which is available on iTunes), Sampson recently released a video concerning Black Gay Men and Low Self Esteem. Sampson deals with those that hide in the club, Gay Bash from the pulpit, as well as deal with those who are hyper-masculine who are Down-Low but always have something to say against the LGBT Community in which they are apart of. Check out his video below.
On Wednesday Sen. Steve Gallardo of Arizona announced that he is gay. This comes after Gov. Jan Brewer has vetoed the Bill that was passed in Arizona that would allow businesses to discriminate against the LGBT Community due to religious beliefs.
Sen. Gallardo tells reporters that “This bill allows businesses to say to me and my friends that we can’t be served in certain restaurants,” he told NBC News. “I don’t know why the Legislature was doing this. I should come out, I should say something, I should share the personal side of my life that I don’t really share.” Gallardo is a Democrat, who has served in the Arizona House 2003-2009, the moved to the Senate in 2011. He is planning to run for the U.S. House seat being vacated by retiring Rep. Ed Pastor this year.
Gallardo states that his coming out is bigger than any race. He's not worried about how it will affect him in the race. He tells media "If I can make it easier for just one person, it's worth it."
Since the start of 2014, I've had one goal and mission: LIVE LIFE AND ENJOY IT!!!! Yes I have a 9 -5 and yes I have some obstacles in life right now, but despite the obstacles in my life, I'm aiming to enjoy my life. I only get once to live. I refuse to be mean, surly, and depressed and stuck in a rut. It is time for us all to be free.
Honey, Sugar Sugar Boo Boo, Go enjoy your life. Stop worrying about what people have to say about you. Stop worrying about things that you can't control. Enjoy your life. Take a vacation, some you time, or just dance your cares away.
GO ENJOY YOUR LIFE!!!!
As a single, Black, Gay Man, I've often asked myself "Musique, Why are you single?" My response to myself and to my friends is constantly " I don't have time to date." Then afterwards, I think to myself "Do I have time to date or is it an excuse." I do work a 9-5, very active in ministry, run this blog and The Bradley Show as well as work on my music career. Sometimes, I do try to take days for myself where I'm able to rest and relax and not be bothered, but could everything outside of work and church be a distraction for me?
Another reason why I feel that I don't have time to date is the fact that I will soon be relocating and I don't really want to start dating and then have to deal with the separation issues that come with moving and I refuse to do a long distance relationship.
Don't get me wrong, I am tired of being single at the age of 28 and I feel that after a year and some change of being single, I need something other than a quick fling in my life. What is a guy like me to do? I've tried doing the whole Jack'd phenomena, Grindr, Hornet, Scruff, and apps like that, but I'm a little too old fashioned for that.
Now I'm a hard working man and I am busying trying to better myself, but am I just simply not making time enough to date because I'm scared of disappointment or rejection? Do I have the time to date and just not making time? What shall I sexy guy like me to do?
Well It's Friday Night and I'm Home Alone. I have the house to myself. I'm sitting in all this peace and quiet. I haven't even turned the television on. I've been listening to music and enjoying this good delicious food from Musique's Kitchen.
You know many people think that living as a single Black Gay Man causes one to be lonely...I beg to differ. I'm single, not miserable. I'm single, not lonely. I'm not even alone. I have family, friends, and loved ones who got my back and who check on me. I also have God on my side and He's the greatest love of them all (no offense to other religions). I may be alone on a Friday night, but I'm at peace and I'm okay with that. I'm even writing this blog since I'm alone. Heck I may even hit the gym or hit the bed early.
I guess that's all I have to say on this issue.
Actor, playwright, philanthropist, and YouTube personality, Tre Melvin is one of a kind. He recently made waves when he started 2014 with admitting and walking in his truth. In a recent video on his hit Youtube Channel, This is a Commentary, Tre addresses one's perception and definition of what it means to be "manly" and a "man." Get into his video below. Tre, spits some hardcore truth.
Well It is Saturday and This also starts the beginning of a busy next couple months. I have church, music, and family engagements. I hadn't mentioned much about what's been going on on the home front, but this past Thursday my family and I suffered a lost.
My Great Aunt Annie passed away. She was 97 and she was very accomplished. It has been a rough last couple days, but thank God for His comfort. I thank God for the time I've had with my great aunt. It's still fresh, but I do know that she's in a better place.
Well that's all I have to say for right now.
I thought I would've been taking a blog-cation but I guess you all can see otherwise. It's Wednesday and since American Horror Story: Coven had its finale, I am no good and I guess that means I'll be hitting the gym again. For the last couple months, I've been kinda. Yes, I have been lazy. I've been experiencing tiredness and I'm guessing due to the stress of trying to get things together for my move to DC in September and with family issues happening.
However through it all, I am persevering. I'm staying focused and positive. Things may not happen in my timing but in God's timing. It's been a bit frustrating putting back money for the money because it seems as if all that wants to happen is happening however, all shall be well. I'm still job hunting and apartment hunting. Reminder if you are interested in helping me succeed in the move I am accepting donations for the move. You will see links to the right of this blog. You can make them via PayPal and Gofundme. Well I'm out,